Thoughts on Attraction, Ideals, and Standards in Dating

Everyone won't agree with me on this, but this is just some random thoughts I had while I was talking to some people.

I think when it comes to finding the one person to settle down with people get bogged down by standards and ideals. If this person isn't this list of things then he's not for me. Why do people subject themselves to that? That's the reason there is so much heartbreak, I'm NOT saying that you have to settle people. Just give some people a chance, look at your "list" of standards and say do I really NEED this person to have this, if the person is 6'5" does that really make him a better person than someone who's only 6'0''? Are we going to be any more compatible if he's 5 inches taller? Is there a relationship between height and attraction because I know some tall single people.

People get caught up with this mold of their "ideal" mate and they rule out people that don't fit that mold. I believe that attraction and compatibility should over power any "ideals" that people have. I understand that people want someone who's educated and has a future, that's a desirable quality in a potential mate. However, everyone knows that one person who wants to marry a rocket scientist, but barely graduated from high school. Or if someone has the qualities you're looking for, but they have a child, they're automatically not as attractive anymore. Does the fact that they may give more of their love to their child than you offend you? That seems like more of a reason to be attracted to someone, if they love their child more than someone they're only dating.

I know people will claim that I'm claiming that you settle for less than you "want" but then again I say, they're only wants not needs. You don't NEED for your wife to be America's Next Top Model and a great chef as long as she's a real woman. You don't NEED for your man to make 6 figures, as long as he gets up everyday and goes to work and takes care of his business at home and work.

The funny thing is, people never end up with who they expect to end up with, it's always like, I didn't think he/she was her/his type. Well surprise surprise, things have a funny way of working themselves out.

-Roderic