I Couldn't Handle Being Famous... Or Could I?

I always joke around and say that I could be a comedian and that I'd be funny as hell for like three days until I run out of material. The more I started thinking about it, the more I'd be afraid to be a famous person though, I started thinking even more and I figured, I'd be the perfect candidate for fame.

I'm way too down to Earth to let money and fame change me. I know a lot of people say that, but then when they make money and get an image they start changing up and doing crazy stuff like jumping up and down on couches and driving with your baby on your lap in traffic. My whole thing is why do you judge them as celebrities? How did you know they weren't crazy before they got famous. That's why I'm saying I wouldn't change my image because if I become famous, it'll be MY image that got me famous. I want the world to see me not the me that's only in movies or on t.v.

That's why I love comedians because they have nothing to hide, they generally put themselves out there so much that if something incriminating comes out about them people are like.... yeah I knew that already anyways. I DO NOT know how to act. I don't mean act like acting in movies, I mean act as in I have no damn sense. I love to laugh and joke around and I wouldn't apologize for doing it. Hell I'm 23 years old, I love the opporunity to make a fool of myself, especially if there's a camera nearby. I'd probably by a papparazzi's wet dream. I think that's why funny people aren't really in the tabloids because they'd do ridiculous antics just so people would laugh.

So here is my disclaimer to Hollywood if I ever become famous... My name is Roderic Williams, I am a damn fool. I love to laugh and hang out with family and friends. My brother and I play fight and play pranks on one another, I don't care if I won an Oscar, my brother would probably tie my shoe strings together. I'm loud, not Chris Rock loud, but you walk in the library and every look at you like "Oh lord here come this motherfucker". My family goes where I go so don't invite me if you ain't got room for 25 people. I may have a sex tape during my career... especially if I introduce my brother to some women who may not actually be women, he may "just to get me back" hide a camera in my trailer and sell the tape for millions. So Hollywood I hope you know what you're getting yourself into if you make me famous because I'm already prepared for you.

-Roderic

"I'm a man!" Are you really?!?

I hear this everyday from so called men. yes I call you guys "so called men" because by my understanding of what a man is, you don't quite meet the criteria. Oooh, did I make some of you mad? Am I now considered weak or feminine because I can clearly point out the flaws in your statement and yet you find it so difficult to point out mine?


Well too bad!

Here's what i understand a man to be. Number one, a man can teach someone else to be a man. That disqualifies half of the so called men right off the bat since some of yall don't take care of the children you brought into this world. You know you can't teach it if you don't know it yourself and if you don't know how to man up and take care of your responsibilities then you can't call yourself a man. In fact some of these women are more of a man than yall so called men because they're doing your job better than you... my mom raised two boys as a single parent and we both turned out just fine, different, but fine (although, I'm waiting on the DNA tests to confirm that my brother is actually related to me).

Another thing about so called men is that they're so quick to point out that they're a man. I'm sorry but if you have to remind us about it that many times, you must have trouble believing it yourself.

Real men are gentlemen, sure they may be a little rough around the edges sometimes, but at the core we love women, not only as sexual tools, but as companions, friends, and family members.

Most men are stubborn. I don't mean stubborn in the sense that we don't want to hear what you're saying, but stubborn in the sense that we want to do everything. Men do have some pride issues, we can't ask for directions, we try to fix anything that breaks, and we try to work through pain and illness like it's nothing. If you're a so called man that has pride issues, you may be stubborn as well, but your stubbornness mainfests itself in different ways like ignoring your significant others' requests for help, arguing about things you neglected to do because you were out "being a man" whatever the hell that means, and thinking your way is ALWAYS the best way.

Now most real men have had their pride shattered, and I don't mean your girlfriend busting out a mapquest printout on you when you're stranded, but I mean your girl straight embarassing you at Thanksgiving dinner because your ass forgot to put the electric bill in the mailbox now you're eating frozen turkey. the difference between so called men and real men is that real men can take that shot to the ego and pull themselves back up. So called men refuse to accept responsibility for that because they know taking a shot to the ego will bring out the b*tch in them and expose them for what they are and remove the possiblity of them ever proclaiming to be a real man and bringing down the stock value of real men.

In fact, it's so many so called men posing as real men that women have begun to think that there's no good men around. Ladies, ladies, please don't fret, there are plenty of real men out there, just we're being drowned out by the so called men and there are far too many of yall for us to ever reach you all.

Don't worry though, the real men in the world will do their best to affect each and every one of yall's lives. I don't mean by sleeping with you either, that's a so called man's game. Real men influence lives by being a friend, brother, father, teacher, lover, confidante, a shoulder to cry on, one night stand (yes they do that too, but only for special instances, lol) you name it they do it!

Now I've taken personal care to try to remove myself from being in either group. I do this because I'm still growing as a person and I'm not going to point out that I'm a real man because I'm not there yet. A real man is what I aspire to be, see the difference between me and a so called man? A so called man would've said, "yeah I'm a real man I can do all the things i just pointed out" when they can't. I'm willing to do what i need to do to be the best man I can be, so I'll just say that I'm a real man in training. Lol.

If you read this and get upset... man up it's only an opinion and like assholes, everyone has one...

Slow Cuts: The Heartbreak Edition

"Excuse Me Miss" but "Would You Mind" if I had a word with you. You see I've went "Seven Whole Days" without speaking to you and I think by this time I deserve some ''Feedback". You were "My first love" but "Lately" you've been "Unpredictable" and I think I know why. You see word on the street is that you're a "Naughty Girl" and you've been "Creepin" around town from "Hotels" to "Holidae Inns". Now "I know you don't love me" because you made a "Promise" to always be true. It "Hurts Like Hell" but "In the morning" I'll be alright because "What goes around comes around". Now all you can say is that you're sorry that you "Led Me On". Why don't you just get "Gone" because we're at the "End Of The Road" and I've already had my "One Last Cry". But baby, "If I had my way" we could "Work It Out" but I think I'm gonna be "Leaving Tonight". I hope that we can be "Together Again" "One Sweet Day" because "I Get So lonely" sometimes and I know all I gotta do is say "Ayo" and you're ready to go at "Anytime and Anyplace".

You had that "Whip Appeal" and you had me "Lovestoned" and "If Only You knew" how much "I Used to Love you" you'd go "Crazy". But right now I'm "So Sick" of "Love" so I'm gonna keep my "Love Locked Down" until you can be my "Angel". However, if that day never comes I'll be "On My Own" and "On Bended Knee" because "I can't help but wait".

Sexual Education In Schools

So another issue I think needs to be investigated is sexual education in schools. Okay now I know that most parents are very religious and strict and want this to be taught at home...I can understand that.

BUT what I don't understand is that once the child knows about it, what's the harm in learning more? If you teach your kid about the birds and the bees and you instill waiting til you get married and blah blah before having sex at like age 10, let's say. Then when the kid gets in high school they have sex ed, why not let the kid go? It's not an abstinence only class, for the most part, but they do preach abstinence. The argument just gets silly once the kid already knows about sex. What's the worst the could happen?

I mean... if you think about it, it's kind of hard to keep teenagers from having sex because teenagers are horny! They're filling out, getting curves and hair and having desires and whatnot, so eventually they're gonna get curious. If you were the irresponsible parent that didn't tell your child about condoms, knowing that sex is damn near everywhere nowadays, this isn't the 50's. Then if your child goes out and gets pregnant or gets someone else pregnant because they had sex without a condom, who you gonna blame?

I'm sorry, but as long as kids have to sit and listen about the War of 1812, kids should be allowed to learn about sex. At least you know they'll be paying attention...

The only thing I'm kinda against is them teaching it in school so early, maturity wise 4th graders aren't ready to hear about that kind of stuff. That was my first time having sexual education in the 4th grade. I was about 8 years old, and I laughed and giggled all throughout the class. I say at least wait til like 8th grade before you bring sexual education around. 8th graders aren't the most mature people, but they're better able to identify with what's going on than with 4th and 5th graders. Around 7th and 8th grade is when all those changes start happening for boys and girls anyway, so it's only natural that they'd have questions and everything, that would be the perfect opportunity to teach them about what's happening and everything.

So... my vote is to keep sex ed in schools, let the teachers and kids have fun with it, just start it a lil later.

You Can't Be Nice To Everyone...

I try to be polite and courteous to everyone I meet. I am very welcoming and try to entertain those that I meet. I used to take it hard when people didn't like me or had something negative to say about me because I pride myself on being the guy that everyone likes. That is... until i found out that you can't please everyone.

There's always going to be someone who hates you for something, be it something you've done purposely or something you have no control over. People may be racist, may not like your voice or smell, or they just may think you're a chump and want to mess with you.

Let's investigate some of these people that no matter what you do, it's damn near impossible to be nice to.

Racists. This is a group of people that hate other people just because of how they were born. Ironically, racism isn't prejudice, anybody can be racist. Most of the time it has to do with their upbringing and life experiences, but everyone you encounter isn't from your past and it's ignorant to assume that every person is the same because of their color. I look at it like this, different brands of crayons are different, just because Brand A's Brown crayon broke everytime you colored with it doesn't mean Brand B's Brown crayon will break. I know the noble thing to do is try to educate these people on how different things are, but honestly, you can't save everyone.

Bullies. I'm not saying a dedicated authority figure can't work with a bully, but if you're being targeted by a bully, it's damn near impossible to be nice to them. Bullies prey on those that they think are weak or who have something that they want. It's an inferiority complex, they don't want to be seen as lacking in any aspect so they have to use their physicality to compensate for their shortcomings.

Drama Queens. Sure, most of the time they're moderately mellow, but who can predict when these time bombs will explode all over the place in a nuclear meltdown of emotions and tears and blaming you for "ruining her life". It's best to try to avoid this occurrence at any cost. You never know when the politest gesture may be misconstrued as the death blow to her reputation.

Your Boss. In a personal setting, I'm not saying it'd be impossible to be friendly to your boss. It's a known fact that 85% of all bosses are jerks. Regardless of the industry, it's known across all borders. We all know the promise we make to ourselves that if we ever become the boss that we'll never be like our boss was to us, but then you start looking at things differently when you're being held responsible for everything in your business. So, you have to become a jerk, therein making you damn near impossible to be nice to.

Police Officers. I'm not saying don't be respectful to them because that's how people get beat or shot. Show them all the respect in the world, but don't think that they're the type to be nice to. It's a simple fact that police are shifty and not saying ALL cops are criminal, but due to the overpowering corruption in the law enforcement field, it's hard to tell who's on your side. So you never know who you're getting, the cool cop who's trying to eliminate corruption or the cool cop who's corrupt, but is only cool as to avoid detection from his superiors. Don't get me wrong, it's not all the cops' fault that people don't trust the police. With all these criminals, putting their lives on the line, and the social isolation that comes with being a policeman/woman, it's arguably understandable that you'd be a prick, but come on... they're not making friends with the whole traffic stop encounter. That's where the majority of people have interactions with the police. I think a more united effort to help the communities without all the racial profiling, itchy trigger finger, drug running, money hungry tendencies would make for a better cop-consumer relationship.

Just my thoughts...let me know how you feel.